a thousand thoughts · life and me · My people · through loves.

You

Yesterday, me and him had a moment. So I had a bad day and start crying in the train and I didn't stop till I came home and he hugged me and we just lie down and talked. I have this moments when I have a situation that make me nervous or stressful  - and… Continue reading You

about disease and feelings · About dreams · Music · My people · through loves.

I wish, my love…

'Cause no, we're not promised tomorrow... This morning 5 am - no sleep. Sadness, an empty stomach and some kicking little feet inside me. I look over my right side. "He is not home yet..." You don't wanna know what I was thinking and how hard I was crying. I am strong but being in… Continue reading I wish, my love…

a thousand thoughts · My people · through loves.

My universe

When I said that I love this man - I meant I love him more than myself. I was thinking he is happy but he proved me wrong. I used to think till this morning that this is it. This is what I wanted and waited all my life, this is why it didn't work… Continue reading My universe

a thousand thoughts · My people · Uncategorized

I am back…I hope I last.

My life changed in a whole different direction that I expected. My life with him -  I waited for this man all my life, of course I didn't expect everything to be perfect but the feeling of rejection that followed me all this years is still here. He sees it like a complaint from my… Continue reading I am back…I hope I last.

about disease and feelings · My people · through loves.

Daily failure of my heart 

I think he doesn't know yet how much i love him. Like he never see my eyes when i look at him, that moment when they start filling with tears. Like the morning waking up when i touch his lips very carefully to not wake him up. Like when i kiss him everywhere just cause… Continue reading Daily failure of my heart 

about disease and feelings · Music · My people · through loves.

Hold on, we are going home…

This week ... is just past continuous all the way up to hell. I couldn't cry today, not even a tear. No crazy thoughts through my mind and I didn't even get angry. But on the other hand, I felt stupid. I got cold and very stubborn. I was just sure that this is not… Continue reading Hold on, we are going home…

about disease and feelings · My people · through loves.

Again? oh, no.

They are the one with problems and in the end I am the crazy one, too sentimental. Zero fuck given. I am so mad. I am terrible at keeping myself together. I want to break everything and smash. But this time will be different? Zero fuck given my ass, I wish. How I wish to… Continue reading Again? oh, no.